How to Design a New Lifestyle in 3 Easy Steps – Psychology Today

Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible.
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There comes a time when you feel stuck in your tedious lifestyle—the same old mindnumbing routines, blurring each day into the next. You greet every sunrise disinterested, unable to muster excitement or motivation.
Whether it’s lifestyle fatigue or high-functioning depression, dullness feels similar. You’ve got a bad case of the “blahs” and are clueless about how to cure them.
Chances are your lifestyle evolved without planning or thought. As a child, you rarely had to worry about your choices; they were usually made for you. What’s more, the newness of life sparkled with excitement. Each day was a daring adventure filled with unknowns.
Even as a young adult, you had reasons to feel enthusiastic. Perhaps you started a new job or school, moved to a new neighborhood, or were in the honeymoon thrill of a new relationship. In any case, you hadn’t established consistency or fallen into repetitive patterns. You didn’t have to work to keep your lifestyle engaging. “Newness” kept everything fresh.
Familiarity is comforting but also breeds stagnation. With repetition, even the most exciting job can become a snooze fest.
Consider boredom to be a trigger for self-reflection. If you’re feeling bored, chances are that you’re taking a passive approach to frustration. Rather than push yourself to explore creative solutions to your boredom, you passively scroll or consume media. You train your brain to detach from frustration by disassociating rather than challenging it.
Unresolved frustration eventually transforms into repression that saps your energy and drains vitality from your life. Hopelessness about your future also sucks the joy of living in the moment.
The road to rebooting your lifestyle doesn’t start with quitting your job, moving to a new neighborhood, or terminating your relationships. Such changes are often cosmetic because they frequently fail to resolve underlying emotional issues.
A change in environment may feel refreshing, but you’re likely to take the same emotional script. In the end, your lackluster lifestyle follows you wherever you go; different environments, the same outcome,
You entirely depended on your parents in your childhood to set your lifestyle. In adulthood, it’s all up to you. Waiting and hoping won’t do. You can’t be passive when refreshing your lifestyle; you will have to get out of your own way.
To get you started, here are three simple steps you can take today:
For more, see 5 Essential Steps to Be Happier and Achieve Your Dreams.
Sean Grover, L.C.S.W., is an author and psychotherapist who leads one of the largest group therapy practices in the United States.
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Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible.


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